Why decision taking is liberating?

February 9, 2018

Have you ever feel the peace of mind provided by a decision taking? If you’re an indecisive person, you know how disturbing it can be to be unable to decide, to always refer to others when it comes to take a decision. And on the inside, there is this permanent difficulty to feel that blockage, this endless sensation of being unable to evolve, this feeling of stagnation…

Why are some people unable to take decisions in some situations? Why can’t these people act, change? What happens during a decision taking?

In November 2017, I was part of a motivation seminar in California… With more than 600 people.

Some of them follow this motivator everywhere, in each event he does, and also signed up for online courses… But only a few of them decide to act! Only 2% of participants would be able and ready to decide for their lives and to act! Is that your case too? Or are you part of the others 98%? Why?

Taking a decision includes 3 aspects:

 

First, the decision has to be motivated! Motivation is a decisional driving force. When your inside motivation is high, decision taking is easy. Because this inside motivation is favouring the decision taking, without any effort. So how to become motivated?

You can be part of all the seminars in the world to find a source of motivation. But is this the right solution? Every time you will be back from these seminars, your enthusiasm will drop. You will be back to your daily routine and worries. It can be explained by the external motivation’s life expectancy which is very low. Only the inside motivation, the one from yourself and your will only, will persist. So how to build an inside motivation? The quickest way is to note that your current life is only bringing you pain. And facing that this pain is unbearable is a great source of inside motivation. You are ready to stop suffering, enduring, and to change your life!

 

Secondly, the decision has to re-establish a consonance! When pain becomes unbearable, a dissonance set up within yourself. You feel that everything is unbalanced, you feel a permanent unease, you feel a dissonance with yourself, with what you live, your life context. A dissonance is a contradiction between an idea and a belief. We name it “cognitions”. If in your actual life, you can affirm that you’re unhappy and on the other hand you think you can’t change anything, you’re in dissonance because acting would in fact enable you to be happier. Admitting that you’re happy would also improve the consonance! To improve the consonance, you have to take a decision : ACT, or affirm that you’re not that unhappy to justify, give an excuse to your inactivity. Taking a decision can improve your inner consonance! But if you decide to act, you have to take a path without pitfalls.

 

Thirdly, the decision has to follow a path without blockages! Most of the time, the lack of decision taking comes from a psychological paralysis. Some thoughts prevent you from moving forward and so from taking decisions. If you deeply feel that you don’t take decisions because you can’t, this belief will turn into a serious blockage, which will prevent you from moving and taking adapted decisions. If you think this often, you’ll never be able to get out of this spiral.

Where does this belief come from? It’s important to start thinking about your own history and especially your beliefs’ history, to be able to take decisions again and act. Decision taking is only possible when the path has been cleaned, when a contact with your deep inner intuition is possible again and same with your inner language.

Decision taking can only be engaged if it’s motivated, if it re-arrange a consonance and if the path is devoid of blockages.

Deciding is liberating, deciding to bring your life an indisputable lightness, because if you say decision taking, you say also evolution and changes. Every decision foreshadows a new perspective which arouse and strengthen inner motivation!

 

 

Dominique Van Acker

Psychologist/coach

www.ersmethod.com/dominiquevanacker 

 

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